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Talisker 10.........

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Related whiskies : Talisker 10 Years Old

Postby Lawrence » Sun Jul 10, 2005 8:32 pm

:D It reminds of the joke about the woman who bought a parrot at a reduced price because it swore continually and she told the salesman with complete conviction that she would cure the parrot of swearing.

Once at home the parrot starting swearing his head off and the woman warned him if he kept it up she'd put him in the freezer for 10 minutes. Underterred by this threat the parrot carried on swearing. In the freezer he went, true to her promise. After 10 minutes she opened up the freezer and brought out the now very shivering parrot, the first words out of his mouth were "#@%^&! Lady what the h*ll did the chicken say?!!
Last edited by Lawrence on Mon Jul 11, 2005 12:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby MGillespie » Sun Jul 10, 2005 8:39 pm

On the subject of parrots...this woman had two female parrots who would say nothing but "We're prostitutes, wanna party?"
She complained to the local vicar, who said "Relax, I have two male parrots who do nothing but pray all day. Bring your parrots over and I'm sure mine will be able to break them of this habit."

The next day, she brought her parrots over, and as soon as the four were together, the females chirped "we're prostitutes, wanna party?"

One of the males looked at the other: "Heavens, our prayers have been answered!"

Mark
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Postby Deactivated Member » Sun Jul 10, 2005 9:17 pm

This parrot walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Can I help you?" The parrot says, "I'll have a dram of the Bruichladdich Links Augusta." The bartender serves it. The parrot takes a sip and says, "Wow! That's really soapy tasting. I'm really disappointed, because I've never had a Bruichladdich I didn't like." The bartender says, "Yeah, the Links Old Course was really good. If you ever have a chance to go Bruichladdich, don't forget to get yourself a Valinch--they're always interesting. And say hi to Jim McEwen for me."

Just thought I'd get us back pointing in the right direction.... :roll:
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Postby Lawrence » Mon Jul 11, 2005 12:20 am

Right, sorry, got off track there, birds of a feather flock off together....... :D
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Postby Deactivated Member » Mon Jul 11, 2005 1:03 am

Oh, these are troubled times, when it takes Mr Tattie Heid to get people back on topic. There is a pestilence in the land....
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Postby Lawrence » Mon Jul 11, 2005 1:41 am

Aye, Tattihead and his partner Mr. Picky, WM forum police! :D
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Postby Crispy Critter » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:18 am

'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This bottle is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is distiller! 'E's an empty! Bereft of whisky, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't glued 'im to the shelf 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is liquid contents are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, poured down the gullet and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-BOTTLE!!
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Postby Mr Fjeld » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:22 am

Crispy Critter wrote:'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This bottle is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is distiller! 'E's an empty! Bereft of whisky, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't glued 'im to the shelf 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is liquid contents are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, poured down the gullet and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-BOTTLE!!

:lol:
I take it you finished the Talisker 10 then......not an understatement!

Skål!
Christian
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Postby Crispy Critter » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:34 am

The irony is, my Talisker 10 is still unopened - although I did finish off a Talisker 18 a couple of months ago... in a shockingly short time.

Now, I'm going the other way, with more bottles open at once than usual... it's a balancing act. The more open at once, the longer each one lasts, but that also gives oxidation a greater chance to affect them.

So far, though, I haven't come across something that was ruined by oxidation.
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Postby Deactivated Member » Mon Jul 11, 2005 6:34 am

Christian, you will recall that the parrot was a Norwegian Blue...'e's pinin' for the fjords. (I remember very well Hardangerfjord being absolutely lousy with parrots when I was there. :roll: )
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Postby Mr Fjeld » Mon Jul 11, 2005 7:07 am

"Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, innit, ay? Beautiful plumage!"

Skål!
Christian
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Postby bernstein » Mon Jul 11, 2005 7:22 am

Any slugs up there? :wink:
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Postby Admiral » Mon Jul 11, 2005 12:44 pm

I was on the bus yesterday and I was sitting opposite an elderly gentleman, and a teenager who had dyed his hair multiple bright colours. The old man kept staring at him. After 10 minutes of this, the teenager said to him, "What's the matter old man, haven't you ever done anything out of the ordinary?"

The man replied, "Well, yes, actually. I once made love to a parrot, and I'm wondering if you're my son."
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Postby Lawrence » Mon Jul 11, 2005 3:18 pm

:D
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Postby MGillespie » Mon Jul 11, 2005 3:57 pm

Crispy Critter wrote:'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This bottle is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is distiller! 'E's an empty! Bereft of whisky, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't glued 'im to the shelf 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is liquid contents are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, poured down the gullet and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-BOTTLE!!


I bow to the eloquence of the above post! :!:
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Postby Admiral » Mon Jul 11, 2005 10:27 pm

Isn't this the point where Graham Chapman walks in, dressed as a colonel and tells us to stop all this, it's silly! :)
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Postby Lawrence » Tue Jul 12, 2005 6:24 am

Maybe we need a dedicated post to "What jokes did you hear last night? :wink:

Presonally I think Mr. Picky should start that one......
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Postby Admiral » Tue Jul 12, 2005 12:21 pm

Okay, I'll start......

Last night, a bloke told me that he thought blends were better than single malts.

HA HA HA :D HA HA HA HA HA :lol: HA HA HA :lol: HA HA HA HA !!!!!! :twisted:
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Postby Deactivated Member » Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:12 pm

Admiral wrote:Okay, I'll start......

Last night, a bloke told me that he thought blends were better than single malts.

HA HA HA :D HA HA HA HA HA :lol: HA HA HA :lol: HA HA HA HA !!!!!! :twisted:


I suppose it depends on the blend, the single malt and the person's taste. I had a work colleague who said he preferred blends to malts and I didn't find the need to laugh. Personally, I would take a dram of Teachers any day of the week over a dram of, say, Glenkinchie.
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Postby Admiral » Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:53 pm

Ummm.....I think you may have taken me a little too seriously there, Nick.

Nastily facetious of me, I admit, but 'twas said in jest all the same. :)

Cheers,
Admiral
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Postby andrewfenton » Tue Jul 12, 2005 2:03 pm

Blends are better than single malts. For cleaning the sink, that is.

Urrrgh, you mean drinking them?
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Postby Deactivated Member » Tue Jul 12, 2005 4:25 pm

Did you know that "facetious" is one of a small handful of words in the English language with all five vowels in order? And "facetiously" gets you the y as well.
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Postby Lawrence » Tue Jul 12, 2005 4:52 pm

I like blends, the Grant's Family Reserve is a whisky with loads of flavour for a very inexpensive price, here it's only C$22. It benefits from some hand warming in palce of water.
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Postby Deactivated Member » Tue Jul 12, 2005 5:41 pm

Admiral wrote:Ummm.....I think you may have taken me a little too seriously there, Nick.

Nastily facetious of me, I admit, but 'twas said in jest all the same. :)

Cheers,
Admiral


Sorry to have missed the humour. I have, though, persuaded myself to go home and have a nice tot of Teachers - on a hot day like today, I find a good blend really hits the spot.
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Postby Deactivated Member » Tue Jul 12, 2005 9:13 pm

Hot for Teachers, eh?
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Postby Lord_Pfaffin » Wed Jul 13, 2005 12:51 am

Teachers do it with class. :wink:
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Postby Admiral » Wed Jul 13, 2005 4:12 am

I once had a teacher who was cross-eyed, but then she never could control her pupils.
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Postby Lawrence » Wed Jul 13, 2005 4:27 am

:D LOL!
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Postby Deactivated Member » Wed Jul 13, 2005 4:41 am

What have I started?
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Postby Lawrence » Wed Jul 13, 2005 7:21 am

:evil: It was Mr. Picky who started all this, where is he by the way?
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Postby Deactivated Member » Wed Jul 13, 2005 9:24 am

Am I supposed to be Mr Picky?

Anyway, I had my Teachers Highland Cream last night and it was delicious. Very soft and smooth, mouthcoating, sweet but with a slightly fruity, smoky kick. I was able to cool it with a gentle breeze coming through the window, so it was a perfect antidote to the heat that had built up all day. I can honestly say I couldn't think of anything I would rather be drinking right then.
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Postby Admiral » Wed Jul 13, 2005 9:45 am

That's what makes any whisky a good one....drinking it in the right place at the right time in the right environment! :D

Cheers,
Admiral
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Postby kallaskander » Wed Jul 13, 2005 11:39 am

Hi there,

rank has its privileges and there is always room at the top, Admiral. But it can be very lonely up here. Are you a solitary connoisseur Admiral? No offence meant and I hope none taken but I would like to add the "right company" to the list. That is not to say that I can not enjoy a good dram all on my own - the right whisky at the right time at the right place. Cheers.

Greetings
kallaskander
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Postby Admiral » Wed Jul 13, 2005 1:48 pm

I agree wholeheartedly.....what good is it enjoying a fantastic malt if you don't have someone to share it with. :) I've been battling for years to get my wife to find some appreciation for the cratur, but it's just not her thing.

Fortunately, I make a point of regularly surrounding myself with people who appreciate good whisky, and we all enjoy both the malts and the company.

Cheers,
Admiral
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Postby Deactivated Member » Wed Jul 13, 2005 1:52 pm

You are lucky to have friends who appreciate the stuff. I'm afraid mine would happily drink Bells, and would enjoy it even more if it were poured from a Royal Lochnagar bottle. They also seem to be able to consume whisky in prodigious quantities. For me, then, whisky is usually a solitary experience.
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